I decided this would happen before the end of the year (2011), and that was in September. After all it had been some 3 years since I had been committed and in love and it was time for something big and juicy to happen.
I was, in effect love starved. So I went out into the jungle like a hunter gatherer and picked under bushes, crossed the savannah strewn with plenty of frogs, and after only a few kisses, none fervent, I began to step into love.
It was a struggle to let go, at first, let go of all the memories of my one heartbreak and the ghostly fear of falling in love again to have to learn more lessons. I did not want to "fall" again in anything in fact... But in the end, I realized perhaps it is not really love if you fall and it hurts to no end. It is something else indeed. But that is another post altogether and one that stirs up the past...
In lieu of falling, I decided to Step into Love. And so it was that my man and I began our walk together, which quickly turned into a dance, a run, a bike ride during sunset along the boardwalk. It turned into the dream I held so high of having a man in my life whom I could totally spoil with all the wonderful things I discovered love to be and in turn be simply loved for who I am. For the yoga I do, the healing nature I have, the sensitive soul I possess, the vegan foodie I am, the radical lover I have always been...
Those who cook together, stay together, he has told me, as he undresses my smile. Cooking together is one of the sexiest forms of foreplay I have ventured to try. It is the most delicious, heart filling delight. We do it alone, and we do it with friends. Sharing the sensuality of our love with others over tacos and fruit. Who would have thought love was so sweet and crunchy and could be shared with great friends in wholesome goodness! Word.
He is right, it brings us together every day. He builds his body strong and when I suggested he try getting organic, quality and healthier eats by shedding his animal protein myth, he softly began to experiment. He taught me that Love is listening to the rhythms of the other and dancing along to a better beat. For us it means Juicing, shopping the organic fresh market on the boardwalk for greens, hemp, spirulina, fruits, beans, veggies, loading up in the bulk section with almonds, ginger, chia, quinoa... And anything and everything I can whip up he gulps down and that in itself is the greatest gift any lover can give his partner. Openness, receiving what is given with an open and eager heart.
I had envisioned a love like this and suddenly it came to me, when I was finally open to receiving it from someone as beautiful as I had wished for. The way to our stomachs is through our hearts in fact.
I always tell my girls, when your heart is broken by someone careless, rest assured you have more room in that heart and the next one who comes along will fit it even better.
Like everything else, relationships worth their salt take practice, patience, and most of all trust... trust that the love you give is your own and the love you get is equal to it, measure for measure... and suddenly this universal recipe becomes a feast for the heart. Bon apetit mon amours.